A year and a half ago, I was raped. I felt like I was in a deep pit, choking, starving, dying. I couldn’t sleep. I couldn’t eat. I couldn’t work. I questioned my safety. I questioned my choices. And, I questioned my life. The shock, the shame and disbelief were all too much. Where is safety? What is safe? How do I survive this? In trying to make sense of this experience, I picked up my camera and started shooting.

These photographs reflect the first year journey of surviving life after trauma.

According to the Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network, Every 73 seconds an American is sexually assaulted. 1 out of every 6 American women and 1 out of 33 American men have been victims of rape.

I often wondered how I can break the cycle for myself and for others. Conversations are happening, but not much has changed. Rape is the only crime where victims carry more blame than the perpetrators.

Rape is also not just an assault of the mind and body but also of the voice. Our current culture of victim blaming and shaming has bred systems and institutions that not only permit the cycle of sexual violence, but also allowed for the silencing of victims.

Silenced by trauma, I found my voice through photography.  Photography became an instrumental tool for me to embrace and value my story. It has allowed me to process in new ways. It has allowed my voice, which I thought was forever silenced, to be heard. Most importantly, it has allowed me to connect with others when I thought the world had abandoned me. For the first time in a long time, I felt seen and heard.

Anja Niedringhaus courageously covered conflict for many years. She sacrificed her life in the pursuit of reporting on the frontlines. The work that I have produced is both similar and very different from hers. I also work in challenging situations to cover trauma. My focus is on the internal conflict of sexual trauma that started with myself and now have branched out to others. Although this work is different from what is typically considered. I found that there is more than one kind of bravery in photography. There is bravery from risking your life to work in dangerous locations like conflict zones, but there is also the bravery of working on deeply intimate stories where you are exposing yourself emotionally and psychologically. I believe this is just as brave and often just as difficult. I hope to be considered for this award to enable more conversations on the violence against women.